13 Comments

I’ve just married a woman that I’m hoping to finish growing old with. We are 72 and 78. Thank you for your essay. I’d love a copy of the book you talked about.

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I love this! I'm curious when you say "Slowly, tho, I am coming to terms with the fact that to be loved, truly madly deeply for being myself, it must mean also that I can never really be seen. There are too many contradictions to being."

Why can't you really be seen? I feel like that would be really nice to have in a romantic relationship...

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Beautiful article. Reading this from the viewpoint of an incredible 11-year relationship that began when we were teenagers. It’s still full of so much love. I would love a copy of the book.

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Going through a painful divorce (newly postpartum) and would love a copy of the book.

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i think we are very alike in some ways. i also love to think about and meditate on love. i really like reading your thoughts

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Almost everyday, I reexamination what romantic love looks like for me, your words helped sharpen that image. Thank you for your thoughts!

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Feb 7·edited Feb 7

This post spoke to me on a deep level. I have always been in love with the idea of love, romantic love (one of my favorite sections of a Social Psychology course was on the different types of love). The part about wanting love that is just holding someone's hand is where I've been thinking a lot lately. I have always longed for a love that felt intellectual (reading poetry, discussing philosophy) but also funny and soothing. I feel out of place in the current hookup culture. Thanks for the open vulnerability. And definitely interested in the book!

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I love your list about how you know you are in love 😻

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The first post of yours that I’ve read after years of following you and I was not disappointed!

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Thank you for your words; I’m going through a particularly, singularly, hard break up right now and this gave me some food for thought; I’m also interested in the book. 💚

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I found your newsletter to be super therapeutic and helpful! Thank you for all that you do! I’d love a copy of The Sunny Nihilist 💖

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Thanks for this! It’s so hard to define and understand love and what it feels like to be in love.

Ps. I’m also interested in the book.

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