I feel like the brave comment is related to "I don't know how you do it" or "I could never do what you do"... yes, you could. If you had to. Which is why I'm doing it. I have no choice. We should not have to be "brave". It makes me feel othered, like I'm separated by my loved ones by glass. Instead of calling me brave, can you break through this glass and help me?
Yes. You. Can. That is really an interesting way to think about it. Like being brave is this werid way to other each other without intention. We are kinda making the person saying it feel bad for not being something and the person who receives it. All folks have good intentions in this situation. I don't think people are trying to do anything but our emotions are so complex and hard to predict. This was beautiful, "can you break through this glass and help me?"
Thank you so much, Carissa. I am thinking of you too, and sending you love and strength. I have 4 images saved on my desktop of things that you posted, named carissa1, carissa2, carissa3, and carissa4, and they've been there for years, as sources of strength for me. They came at exactly the time that I needed them, and have lived there since, and are a part of me now.
Yael, thanks so much for telling me. I imagine I am sitting alone in a dark room making things that no one likes and yet I have to make them for some reason. To keep going. Wow. I am curious what is going on now and what would you need to hear?
Thanks Jessica! We are doing ok. Seriously. just wanted to send an update and also say what I was thinking about. ALSO, we are moving to MPLS finally maybe. In the spring. Hope to see you there!
I bet you can relate to this in that people probably said this to you too. It is such a mixed bag. We are doing great in a weird way but also it's hard.
I am not sure about the perspective of divorce. If that is what you are going through. I can say that I feel you. As someone who has considered it as an option, no happy marriages end in divorce. Seems like. It might be finite - or my parents moved in together twice after getting divorced - or could open up to a new love. Either way, I am thinking about you in this moment and offering love from this weird digital space. Are you in your mid-life? I feel like there is this moment lots of people I know are in where things seem like they are ending...but i hope it opens up space for rest and new growth.
Thank you Carissa for your kind response and thought provoking perspective. This forum is indeed empathic and warmly supportive.
I feel privileged to be part of it.
And I feel you too. I do. Though I believe that men, in general, and I am equally suspect on the matter, are sensitive but somewhat in a linear way. So 'happy' marriages between a woman and a man can mean differently to the players. On my part I try and learn from great women writers such as Clarissa Pinkola Estes and try and take some small steps to bridge the 'planetary' divide.
I feel blessed that I can freely express myself here.
Thank you for this, Carissa. I think you are incredibly brave and I want you to know that reading your newsletter and going through your website have kept me going during incredibly tough times. The past few years have not been easy for me and many times, you have given me bravery. I'm thinking about you and sending you hugs virtually.
This is so spot on. I addressed in my short film Alphabet Luxury about my cancer journey and I relate so much to your words. You’re an inspiration. Thank you for what you do.
I’m so glad L & M got to goof off at your opening! It was a real pleasure to be there and hang a bit. Here’s to connecting more before your move!! Thinking of you. ♥️
I feel like the brave comment is related to "I don't know how you do it" or "I could never do what you do"... yes, you could. If you had to. Which is why I'm doing it. I have no choice. We should not have to be "brave". It makes me feel othered, like I'm separated by my loved ones by glass. Instead of calling me brave, can you break through this glass and help me?
Yes. You. Can. That is really an interesting way to think about it. Like being brave is this werid way to other each other without intention. We are kinda making the person saying it feel bad for not being something and the person who receives it. All folks have good intentions in this situation. I don't think people are trying to do anything but our emotions are so complex and hard to predict. This was beautiful, "can you break through this glass and help me?"
also see you in MPLS when we move there...
if you want... ha ha.
Yes 100%!
Thank you so much, Carissa. I am thinking of you too, and sending you love and strength. I have 4 images saved on my desktop of things that you posted, named carissa1, carissa2, carissa3, and carissa4, and they've been there for years, as sources of strength for me. They came at exactly the time that I needed them, and have lived there since, and are a part of me now.
Yael, thanks so much for telling me. I imagine I am sitting alone in a dark room making things that no one likes and yet I have to make them for some reason. To keep going. Wow. I am curious what is going on now and what would you need to hear?
Thinking of you, Carissa.
Thanks Jessica! We are doing ok. Seriously. just wanted to send an update and also say what I was thinking about. ALSO, we are moving to MPLS finally maybe. In the spring. Hope to see you there!
I’m sending you love, Carissa. It’s nice to see you in my inbox. Your work and words are always so beautiful.
I bet you can relate to this in that people probably said this to you too. It is such a mixed bag. We are doing great in a weird way but also it's hard.
Thinking about you Carissa and M. I am grateful for your words, your kindness and your authenticity. You are so refreshing. Sending you Love.
Sending it back to you Monica. Let me know if you want me to send hopes about something specific in your life :)
Dear Carissa,
Life and death are conjoined. How and when always remains the question.
Birth generates attachment. Departure leaves behind pain. The prospect of untimely departure presents the unfulfilled concept of life.
Spiritual philosophies advise detachment. Quite the conundrum.
Marriage and divorce are a matter of choice.
The void of divorce is similar to death though death is finite.
Can the perspective and dealing with divorce be definitive?
Thank you, and to all of us at Bad At Keeping Secrets. I discovered us in the process of being introduced to Maggie Smith.
Warmest....
I am not sure about the perspective of divorce. If that is what you are going through. I can say that I feel you. As someone who has considered it as an option, no happy marriages end in divorce. Seems like. It might be finite - or my parents moved in together twice after getting divorced - or could open up to a new love. Either way, I am thinking about you in this moment and offering love from this weird digital space. Are you in your mid-life? I feel like there is this moment lots of people I know are in where things seem like they are ending...but i hope it opens up space for rest and new growth.
Thank you Carissa for your kind response and thought provoking perspective. This forum is indeed empathic and warmly supportive.
I feel privileged to be part of it.
And I feel you too. I do. Though I believe that men, in general, and I am equally suspect on the matter, are sensitive but somewhat in a linear way. So 'happy' marriages between a woman and a man can mean differently to the players. On my part I try and learn from great women writers such as Clarissa Pinkola Estes and try and take some small steps to bridge the 'planetary' divide.
I feel blessed that I can freely express myself here.
Thank you, and all on this forum, again.
Thank you for this, Carissa. I think you are incredibly brave and I want you to know that reading your newsletter and going through your website have kept me going during incredibly tough times. The past few years have not been easy for me and many times, you have given me bravery. I'm thinking about you and sending you hugs virtually.
I want to send it back to you. Thanks for taking the time to say hi. I think we are all brave. I really do. I should have started with that.
This is so spot on. I addressed in my short film Alphabet Luxury about my cancer journey and I relate so much to your words. You’re an inspiration. Thank you for what you do.
Oh my. Cancer. Can you send a link to the film? Thanks for the kind words. ALSO art as a way to cope - that is totally up my alley.
Of course:
https://vimeo.com/850209012
Beautiful beautiful
Thanks Paolo. Now thinking about you. Wondering who you are and what you are going through.
🤍
I’m so glad L & M got to goof off at your opening! It was a real pleasure to be there and hang a bit. Here’s to connecting more before your move!! Thinking of you. ♥️